Monday, October 13, 2008

Dentists & Doctors

Dear New Dentist to Which I Will Be Making an Appointment With for Grey:
     After a few days of his obsessing over the fact that his two top front teeth hurt (and yet, NOT the *one* molar with the actual cavity I have spotted), I have convinced him that the dentist is his friend, one to make his teeth feel better, even if it gets rather loud in the office because of the 'cool tools' needed to help his teeth feel better.
     I'd like to request that you A) do NOT attempt to get ME to sit in the chair and allow you to poke and prod inside MY mouth, as my dental issues are an ENTIRELY different story, B) that somehow you make yourself NOT remind him of a police officer, as he is somehow a bit skeeved about them lately, and C) never mention the word "sleep" if sedation is needed, because I will *guarantee* a 2-year-old rebellion even against the most powerful of drugs, simply because he has the willpower of a Tibetan MONK when it comes to staying awake.  Thanks.  Also, since he has become enamored with the optometrist since I received my new glasses, could you maybe fish out a nifty pair of sunglasses or something from your (hopefully present) 'treasure chest?'  Faboo.

And to the Doctor, Whom Grey Needs to See For a Possible Ear Infection & his Upcoming Three-Year Exam:
     His last ped was fantastic.  At this point in time, if you make a comment regarding his age, height, or weight, he WILL give you a dissertation regarding how far away his birthday is, how tall he is, and how much of a *big boy* he is.  DO NOT say the word 'baby' in his presence, or else he will begin to insist that he wants ME to have one, and how he is no longer one.  Just to summarize:  HE WILL TALK YOUR EAR OFF, and has quite a bit of medical knowledge, as one of his favorite pasttimes is to observe the sessions when Papa's nurse comes to work with him... including the trach change.  So, for your own benefit... you may want to seek out some earplugs.  Unless you are ready for preschool help in writing your next medical article.

Sincerely yours,
     The Mother of a Preschool KNOW-IT-ALL

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